How to choose your Mentor

How to choose your Mentor?

This is a very common question that comes to the mind, especially when people are becoming more and more aware about the important of self-development and growth.

Here are few things to keep in mind while choosing your Mentor -

- Connection (Are you feeling an instant connection with that person)?
- Has the person got results for himself/herself that you want to achieve?
- The values of that person
- Is the person a talker or a doer as well?

While all these are fine, you also need to keep in mind that the choice has to be from both sides - that person will choose you as your mentee and vice-versa.

Also not to forget - books can be your mentor as well. But if you want to go ahead, implement and see results within a relatively short span of time, then a human intervention is utmost required.

Finding the right mentor is not really a secret to success – it's as obvious as it is essential. Learning from someone older, wiser and more experienced is an invaluable business opportunity, whether you've just started your first job or you're halfway through your career. As we slip into the day-to-day routine of working life, it's easy to get lost in the moment – our problems are 6 inches from our face, and a mentor can be the person to reset things so we can look at our careers and growth from a new perspective.

None of this is new information. We all would love to have a guiding hand help us figure out this complex and stressful professional world. If you're looking for a mentor, these are the three most important things to keep in mind:

• Define what you want out of your career and what you need to learn to get there.
• Approach a mentor relationship as if it's a business friendship – be casual and friendly, and try not to ask weird questions like, "Will you be my mentor?"
• Start with your own professional network. We often already have mentors who provide advice in various ways, and all it takes is a little effort from us to grow that connection into an ongoing relationship.

Ryan Holiday, an author and career expert, said finding a mentor starts with working hard and developing a personal reputation of success. By focusing on your own role and career, you can set yourself up to connect with more seasoned business professionals who will see your talent and want to help you grow.

“Powerful people are constantly on the look out for talented young people; they cannot find enough of them,” he said. “To develop a reputation as someone who is teachable, curious, motivated, talented, and above all, well-balanced and reliable, is the single best way to attract a mentor. As Sheryl Sandberg said, it’s not find a mentor and you will do well, it’s do well and a mentor will find you.”

How to find a mentor

The first step to find a mentor is defining what you want out of your career. This may not mean planning out your whole career – it's important to leave room to go where things take you – but defining what you want in the short term can give you a clear path forward. Consider your career path and narrow it down so you can determine who has your dream job and who you admire, 

"Successful mentoring relationships happen when the mentor and mentee are the right match," Driscoll said. "Reach out to someone you think you are comfortable with, who can be a neutral sounding board, and [who] will also provide great advice."

You can also look in your own professional circle. These individuals can be former bosses, former professors or teachers, co-workers in another department, or family friends. As you look, try to prioritize someone who can give you long-term advice about your industry and has a good idea of your own company and what it takes to advance within your role.

"I think it's probably best to have a combination of somebody who knows your internal organization well but not necessarily works there," Salemi said. "They can provide that insight with having a grander view of your career's growth."

Someone who has a general idea of your current role and industry will be able to give you advice on things like new projects to explore, certifications or training you need to get ahead, and how to manage office politics within your organization.

Once you're ready to reach out to someone, it's important to keep things casual. Salemi said your approach to a potential mentor should be the same as an approach to a potential friend – your relationship will develop over time. Don't force things; stay relaxed. Lessons and advice will come over time.

"It's not like you'll be at a conference and chat with someone sitting next to you and say, 'Oh, will you be my mentor?'" Salemi said. "It's a process. It's kind of like when you think about friends in your life, how you met them and how maybe over the period of a year or so you've gotten to become really good friends … in the beginning, you didn't say, 'Will you be my friend?' That would be completely awkward."

So, how do you choose your mentor?